This Santa don't jump down your flue
And he shan't come to town just for you
Saint Nick's on a spree
If his victim don't flee
Then the frantic young strumpet gets slew.
I don't want this daffy guy mad at me
On a jaunt from the laughing academy
In his whiskers and cap
There's a risk he might snap
Nonchalantly afflicting anatomy.
Oliver MacGreevy as a psychotic Santa, attacking Joan Collins by the fire in Tales from the Crypt (Freddie Francis, 1972).