Friday, October 19, 2018
A tryout for Munster makes sense
The guy weighs a ton, is immense
Though an itty-bit green
He's a hitting machine
For a fly he will run through a fence.
In an episode of The Munsters, "Herman the Rookie" (Jerry Paris; 1965), Herman Munster (Fred Gwynne) is given a tryout by the Los Angeles Dodgers' manager Leo Durocher.
Thursday, October 18, 2018
Don't struggle, your soul's found its mate
Does it bug you your role's bound by fate?
A plan set in motion
By tana leaf potion
One chug from the bowl you'll feel great.
John Carradine, Lon Chaney Jr., and Ramsay Ames as the reincarnated Ananka, in The Mummy's Ghost (Reginald Le Borg; 1944). Title by preternatural James Finn Garner.
Wednesday, October 17, 2018
They pay him to murder by rote
The player prefers to emote
As limping old lunk
He simply gets drunk
Essaying a perf that's one note.
Lon Chaney Jr. slogs through one of the Mummy films. Who can tell which one? Title by ill-gotten Donald B. Benson.
Tuesday, October 16, 2018
He drinks tana, makes jokes that are lewd
If he can, he will choke you--how rude!
Though a crusty old mummy
He's lusty and scummy
Because, man, this jamoke's still a dude.
Lon Chaney Jr and Ramsay Ames in The Mummy's Ghost (Reginald Le Borg; 1944).
Monday, October 15, 2018
He's gimpy, but hot to embrace her
He limps from dry rot, but he'll pace her
In a rut, but not slowing
Just what keeps Lon going?
Put simply, a shot and a chaser.
Lon Chaney Jr and Ramsay Ames in a still for The Mummy's Ghost (Reginald Le Borg; 1944). Title by David Cairns, like totally.
Friday, October 12, 2018
The object of wonder and dread,
He lobbies for one he can wed
But the miss they create
Will dismiss him as mate
She's a snob, and the honeymoon's dead.
Colin Clive, Elsa Lanchester, Boris Karloff, and Ernest Thesiger in Bride of Frankenstein (James Whale; 1935).
Thursday, October 11, 2018
All he's known and desired laid waste
Dust and bone, long expired, and erased
But for Kharis, no peace
Not a prayer for release
All alone and bone tired, displaced.
Lon Chaney Jr. as Kharis in The Mummy's Tomb (Harold Young; 1942), Title by restorative Donald B. Benson.
Wednesday, October 10, 2018
This mummy-turned-freak has some nerve
Her yummy physique he'd preserve
"Only first she must die
And be cursed, same as I."
For a crummy antique he's a perv.
Boris Karloff and Zita Johann in The Mummy (Karl Freund; 1932).
Tuesday, October 9, 2018
This fink is so sick he could drool
She shrinks from the icky old ghoul
The mystical geezer
Insists he can please her
He thinks that the chick's old, old school.
Boris Karloff creeps out and Zita Johann in The Mummy (Karl Freund; 1932).
Monday, October 8, 2018
This Mummy will lust as before
When summoned, he just wants to score
His quarry seems trapped
Then Boris gets zapped
And crumbles to dust on the floor.
Zita Johann asks the goddess Isis to protect her from Boris Karloff in The Mummy (Karl Freund; 1932). Title by Donald B. Benson.
Friday, October 5, 2018
The grimmest of patchwork, but hey,
To him they're a match, wants to play
They're stiffs newly stitched
And if they got hitched
What dimwit would catch the bouquet?
Elsa Lanchester and Boris Karloff in Bride of Frankenstein (James Whale; 1935). Welcome to Franken-Fridays.
Thursday, October 4, 2018
The mummy (here played by Tom Tyler)
Guards the princess but hopes to defile ‘er.
After quaffing his swill
He sets out to kill
Can there really be anything viler?
Western star Tom Tyler as Kharis in The Mummy's Hand (Christy Cabanne; 1940), before and after mummification.
Wednesday, October 3, 2018
Warm evenings alongside the Nile
Tana leaves, a sweet song, a sly smile
When a tyro, young Kharis
Felt Cairo was Paris
Now he's evil prolonged, Mummy-style.
James Finn Garner
Tom Tyler as Kharis, pre-mummification, in The Mummy's Hand (Christy Cabanne; 1940). Writer Jim Garner is the host of the poetry site Bardball, dedicated to "Reviving the art of baseball doggerel."