Teed Off-ering

At driving der Bingle was good
Reached greens that no pro ever could
His swing only fair,
he'd get the ball there,
by using his over-sized wood

Be Scared, My Lovely

He glowers the length of the hall
He towers and makes her feel small
A dark silhouette,
he looms like a threat
A shadow that's casting a pall

Ida Lupino is overwhelmed by handyman Robert Ryan in a production still from Beware, My Lovely (Henry Horner, 1952).

Private Eye-line

Phil Marlowe, a private detective
sees life from a Guy Noir perspective
Director and crew
share Phil's point-of-view
by making the cam'ra subjective



Top: Audrey Totter stares at the camera in Lady in the Lake (Robert Montgomery, 1947). Above: The film is shot almost entirely from the subjective view of its director and star, Robert Montgomery, so we only see him reflected in mirrors. Below: A conventional, non-subjective promo still. Photo source: DVD Beaver, Ride the High Country and Classic Mongomery.

Bubble Trouble

When she calls me up, it's a pain!

and what she says to me's in vain
She just shouldn't ought'r
Cuz she's under water
I can't understand what she's sayin'!

Norm



She talks way too much when she phones
On shopping and boys always drones
But here's the real shocker
she calls from the locker
belonging to one Davey Jones

Surly

This concludes our week long gallery tour of the photos of
Bruce Mozert, underwater photography pioneer. Time to
towel off. Pics: Smithsonion.com

Waikiki Weakened

A fish playing hooky from school, a

gal dancing to uke does the hula
How do they hold poses
without holding noses?
They're pros, and they do it for moolah!

Norm



When Hans pulled his finger from dyke
'cross farmland swam walleye and pike
And undersea lasses
sashayed in the grasses
as wet ukulele played Ike

Surly

Photo by Bruce Mozert, a pioneer in underwater
photography. Courtesy of Smithsonion.com

Mow, Mow, Mow Your Boat

Well watered, lawns rapidly grow
increasing the need for a mow
Cutting grass when it's wet
will work up a sweat
so gardeners go with the flow

Yet another photo by that pioneer in underwater
gag photography, Bruce Mozert. Smithsonion.com

Watering Hole In One

When golfing a hazard means trouble
A bogey, or even a double
Hit trap in a lake?
Your par you won't make
I'm sorry for bursting your bubble

Photo by 20,000 leagues underwater photographer,
Bruce Mozert. Courtesy of Smithsonion.com

Fish Or Cute Bait

A fisherman needs to use bait

of just the right size and right weight

But what kind of schnook

would put on his hook
his girlfriend while out on a date?

Norm

Photo by Bruce Mozert, a pioneer in underwater
photography. Courtesy of Smithsonion.com

Jack Cardiff, R.I.P.

From mountain drop dizzying steep
to lipstick red ravishing deep
D.P.'s patron saint
with film stock would paint
bold colour to make the eyes weep



Jack Cardiff, a master of Technicolor, was the director of
photography on A Matter Of Life and Death, Black Narcissus
(pictured) and The Red Shoes, as well as many other films.

Say Cheese (cake)

Diverted by thoughts that were lewd

I got her words all misconstrued

I thought she meant me

when she said that she

would like to take pics of me, nude