Showing posts with label Brains. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Brains. Show all posts

Sunday, December 24, 2023

Auld Lang 'Stein



The night before Christmas and lo,
the castle was buried in snow.
A monster was stirring
as engines were purring,
and lab machines started to glow.

A bearded guy carried a sack.
Not Santa, but Igor, hunch-back.
His bag, full of brains,
was covered with stains
from heads he had given a crack.

As lightning continued to build,
the doctor was tickled, then thrilled.
He said, "It's alive!"
(Just like Colin Clive)
and opened the bubbly he'd chilled.

But Doc, who had wanted a son,
soon found that his plans were undone.
For Igor, the cad
used a brain that was bad,
Though he and the monster had fun.

On Christmas, the cold castle air
was warmed by a torch's red glare.
The monster, when singed
became quite unhinged...
and hung Ig by the chimney with care.


Words and art © 2023 Hilary Barta; Color: Jason Millet

Sunday, April 4, 2021

Zombie Flesh Easter

 


It's Easter, give praise, do not mourn
Your deceased savior's raised and reborn
But these dead, now alive
Open heads to survive
And will feast on your brains Sunday morn.

Pasty-faced extras lurch through Night of the Living Dead (1968). Our title is by David Cairns, and is a nod to Zombies 2, aka Zombie Flesh Eaters (1979). We're going to hell in an Easter basket for resurrecting this blasphemous limerick each year.

Thursday, January 31, 2019

Cavemansplaining



His peers only turn up their snoots
His theory they spurn, think a hoot
The hive-minded fools
From ivy league schools
Will fear what he'll learn as a brute.

The Neanderthal Man (Ewald André Dupont; 1953). Professor Groves (Robert Shayne) presents his crackpot theory that Neanderthal man was more intelligent than 'modern man' because Neanderthals had bigger brains. Throwback Thursday is getting hairy.

Friday, January 11, 2019

The Hooch of Frankenstein



Our monster’s now deep in the sauce
What’s left of his brain’s a dead loss
Though served smokes and pottage
He burns down the cottage
--If I were the monk, I’d be cross.

Paul Truster

The Monster (Boris Karloff) and the hermit (O.P. Heggie) party hearty in Bride of Frankenstein (James Whale; 1935). Franken-Fridays is fit as a fiddle.

Friday, November 16, 2018

You've Gotten Female



The monster's aware that he's mental
And wants to be social and gentle.
He thinks he'd be sane
With a little girl's brain
And doesn't grasp harm incidental.

Donald B. Benson

Bela Lugosi, Lon Chaney Jr., and Janet Ann Gallow play musical brains in The Ghost of Frankenstein (Erle C. Kenton; 1942).

Friday, November 9, 2018

Swap Meat



Though a brute when he's injured or riled,
This galoot would be winsome and mild
It seems strange but explains
His exchanging of brains
With this cute little innocent child.

In The Ghost of Frankenstein (Erle C. Kenton; 1942), the Monster (Lon Chaney Jr) is obsessed with Cloestine Hussman (Janet Ann Gallow). Title by meaty David Cairns.

Friday, June 8, 2018

Henry and Goon



My irksome assistant's complaining
The jerk seems resistant to training
A bent-over fool
Demented and cruel
From work he's dismissed for bad-braining.

Dwight Frye, Colin Clive, and Boris Karloff or his stand-in in Frankenstein (James Whale, 1931).

Friday, May 4, 2018

Fritz Complicated



If you sent this great lout for a brain
Lacking sense to come out of the rain
The organ he'll grab
From the morgue won't be fab
It's quite mental, no doubt, and insane.

David Cairns

Fritz (Dwight Frye) steals the wrong brain in Frankenstein (James Whale; 1931).

Friday, April 6, 2018

Gaffe Riot



You sigh...you would weep but you laugh
Your guy is a creep and a half
He fetches a brain
That's wretched, insane
Just why do you keep him on staff?

The Three Oddfathers: Surly Hack, Donald B. Benson and David Cairns

Frankenstein (James Whale; 1931): Colin Clive as Henry, Dwight Frye as Fritz, and some poor guy's legs.
LimerWrecks is going on vacation. See you in a few weeks.

Friday, January 12, 2018

The No-Goodnik, the Mad and the Pug-Ugly



While the storm is the pits, cold and rainy,
True to form, hunchback Fritz plays it zany
When the creature restarts
It lacks speech and all smarts
It's abnormally witless, bad-brainy.

Dwight Frye, Colin Clive, and the monster of Frankenstein (James Whale; 1931).

Friday, January 5, 2018

If the Shoe Fritz...



Henchman Fritz is the type who'll complain
He'll throw fits and he'll gripe and profane
But the schnook shouldn't grumble
As a crook Fritz will fumble
He admits that he swiped the wrong brain!

Dwight Frye as Fritz, the hunchback assistant to Frankenstein (James Whale; 1931). Dwight Frye-Day is our favorite day of the week.

Friday, December 29, 2017

Au Bon Brain



One man crazy, and three very sane
They may praise him, but me they disdain
They're society's cream
I'm some guy makes you scream
I'm amazed they'd trust me with the brain.

David Cairns

When Victor questions his sanity, Henry says 'One man “crazy”, three very sane spectators.' Of course he leaves out Fritz, our narrator. Dwight Frye (Fritz), Edward Van Sloan, John Boles (Victor), Mae Clarke, Colin Clive (Henry), and Boris Karloff, in  Frankenstein (James Whale; 1931).

Friday, November 17, 2017

Dullard Oblongata



Fetch a brain that is warm, good and kind
Must be sane, well-informed, and refined
You had only one job
You dumb drone, you poor slob...
Who'll explain the abnormal-type mind?

Fritz (Dwight Frye) drops the normal brain in Frankenstein (James Whale; 1931). Title by the oblong David Cairns.

Friday, October 13, 2017

Assistance is Futile



Signs of strain, the maniacal laugh
It's quite plain Hank should try the half-caf
Playing God is the pits
With a clod such as Fritz
Drop a brain? Why's this guy still on staff?

Brain-dropper Fritz (Dwight Frye) watches from the background as Henry Frankenstein (Colin Clive) is restrained by Dr. Waldman (Edward Van Sloan) and Victor Moritz (John Boles): Frankenstein (James Whale; 1931). It's hard to imagine Karloff posing for stills wrapped as the Monster.

Friday, August 25, 2017

Fritz a Wonderful Life



I'm an oddball, both sweaty and vile!
Playing God, brain roulette, make me smile!
Near a graveyard I lurk
And behave like a jerk
Oh, the bodies I get to defile!

Henry Frankenstein (Colin Clive) and Fritz (Dwight Frye) unearth a coffin in Frankenstein (James Whale; 1931). It's Dwight Friday at LimerWrecks.

Friday, August 4, 2017

No Intel Inside



With bodies "donated" we screwed
Playing God, we created a...dude
But without a sound mind
It's a lout, unrefined
A big clod in a hateful bad mood.

Fitz (Dwight Frye) looks down as Doctor Waldman (Edward Van Sloan) and Henry Frankenstein (Colin Clive) subdue the Monster (Boris Karloff) in Frankenstein (James Whale, 1931). Title by LimerWrecks insider Donald B. Benson.

Friday, June 2, 2017

Dwight to Remain Silent

 

This devil, I guess, is not deft
And he'll never confess to the theft
Of an unstable brain
That's been labeled insane
Nor, ever, the mess that he left.

David Cairns

Dwight Frye as hunchback Fritz in Frankenstein (James Whale, 1931). We celebrate Dwight Frye-Days every week at LimerWrecks.

Friday, May 26, 2017

Who's Storing the Mind?



Never trust a good brain to this schlub
He's disgusting, inane, just a grub
Lets it smash on the floor
In a splash of grey gore
When it's bust, an insane one he'll sub.

David Cairns

Dwight Frye-Days remembers the unique character actor, here as the bumbling Fritz in Frankenstein (James Whale; 1931.

Friday, May 19, 2017

Evasion of the Body Snatcher



Dwight tries to explain how he's bumbled
There's a crisis with brains that he fumbled
One's improper, a wreck
And one's dropped on the deck
But what lies in Frye's cranium's jumbled.

David Cairns

Dwight Frye-Days celebrates character actor Dwight Frye, here as Fritz in Frankenstein (James Whale; 1931).

Friday, April 7, 2017

Cane Mutiny



This pipsqueak with cane is a scandal
Of crypts he's a dangerous vandal
Unruly and vile
Like a ghoul he'll defile
But slippery brains he'll mishandle.

Dwight Frye-Days celebrates actor Dwight Frye, here as Fritz in Frankenstein (James Whale; 1931).