Zombie Flesh Easter

It's Easter, give praise, do not mourn
Your deceased savior's raised and reborn
But these dead, now alive
Open heads to survive
And will feast on your brains Sunday morn.

Pasty-faced extras lurch through Night of the Living Dead (1968). Our title is by David Cairns, and is a nod to Zombies 2, aka Zombie Flesh Eaters (1979). We're going to hell in an Easter basket for resurrecting this blasphemous limerick each year.

Bashing the Bishop

 

Re-brained was the Monster, egad!

When chained, his response was: get mad
Broke free and then fled
But seeing deep red

Profaned, "Sacred monuments...BAD!

Boris Karloff in Bride of Frankenstein (James Whale; 1935). Thanks to David Cairns for the smashing title.

Zombie Flesh Easter

It's Easter, give praise, do not mourn
Your deceased savior's raised and reborn
But these dead, now alive
Open heads to survive
And will feast on your brains Sunday morn.

Pasty-faced extras lurch through Night of the Living Dead (1968). Our title is by David Cairns, and is a nod to Zombies 2, aka Zombie Flesh Eaters (1979). We're going to hell in an Easter basket for resurrecting this blasphemous limerick each year.

Zombie Flesh Easter

It's Easter, give praise, do not mourn
Your deceased savior's raised and reborn
But these dead, now alive
Open heads to survive
And will feast on your brains Sunday morn.

Pasty-faced extras lurch through Night of the Living Dead (1968). Our title is by David Cairns, and is a nod to Zombies 2, aka Zombie Flesh Eaters (1979). We're going to hell in an Easter basket for resurrecting this each year.

Rennie's From Heaven

Like a Christ who has dropped the long robe
He seems nice, with no prop anal probe
Is he ET messiah
Or DC pariah?
Like on ice, he can stop the whole globe.

David Cairns

The mysterious Klaatu (Michael Rennie) arrives in The Day the Earth Stood Still (Robert Wise; 1951).

Clods and Monsters

High windows glow bright in the dark
Huge engines ignite with a spark
Though God disapproves,
The body...it moves..!
The minion delights--what a lark!

Dwight Frye is the hunchbacked assistant to Colin Clive, reacting to the arm of Boris Karloff or his stand-in in this scene from Frankenstein (James Whale, 1931).

Zombie Flesh Easter

It's Easter, give praise, do not mourn
Your deceased savior's raised and reborn
But these dead, now alive
Open heads to survive
And will feast on your brains Sunday morn.

Pasty-faced extras lurch through Night of the Living Dead (1968). Our title is by David Cairns, and is a nod to Zombies 2, aka Zombie Flesh Eaters (1979). We're going to hell in an Easter basket for reposting this limerick. 

Cat People on Sunday

Do these people who mew often stray
Beneath steeple to pew where they pray
To old Gods and their laws?
Or just nod, clean their paws?
Do they weep when we neuter and spay?

Simone Simon, the star of Cat People, returns as Irena in The Curse of the Cat People (Gunther von Fritsch, Robert Wise; 1944), haunting Ann Carter.

I Saw Mummy Dissing Santa Claus

The Mummy came over to see
Our crèche and our lights and our tree.
He said, "It's not bad,
Although it's a fad."
Perhaps it's because he's B.C.

Donald B. Benson

B.C., but not PC. Lon Chaney Jr. peeps in The Mummy's Curse (Leslie Goodwins, Reginald LeBorg; 1944).

Zombie Flesh Easter

It's Easter, give praise and don't mourn
Your deceased savior's raised and reborn
But these dead, now alive,
Open heads to survive
And will feast on your brains Sunday morn.

Pasty-faced extras lurch through Night of the Living Dead (1968). Our title is by David Cairns, and is a nod to Zombies 2, aka Zombie Flesh Eaters (1979). We're going to hell for reposting this holiday limerick. Just like the living dead, new limericks will return!

Zombie Flesh Easter

It's Easter, give praise and don't mourn
Your deceased savior's raised and reborn
But these dead, now alive,
Open heads to survive
And will feast on your brains Sunday morn.

Pasty-faced extras lurch through Night of the Living Dead (1968). Our title is by David Cairns, and is a nod to Zombies 2, aka Zombie Flesh Eaters (1979). We're going to hell for reposting this holiday limerick. Just like the living dead, Peter Lorre will return!

Zombie Flesh Easter

It's Easter, give praise, do not mourn
Your deceased savior's raised and reborn
But these dead, now alive
Open heads to survive
And will feast on your brains Sunday morn.

Pasty-faced extras lurch through Night of the Living Dead (1968). Our title is by David Cairns, and is a nod to Zombies 2, aka Zombie Flesh Eaters (1979). We're going to hell for reposting this holiday limerick.  The Universal Monsters will return tomorrow.

Zombie Flesh Easter

It's Easter, give praise, do not mourn
Your deceased savior's raised, is reborn
But these dead, now alive
Open heads to survive
And will feast on your brains Sunday morn.

Pasty-faced extras lurch through Night of the Living Dead (1968). Our title is by David Cairns, and is a nod to Zombies 2, aka Zombie Flesh Eaters (1979).

Playing Godawful

When this madman with sacrilege toyed,
Doing bad was an act he enjoyed
For God's power he'd thirst,
But by knowledge was cursed...
Such cadaverous quacks are destroyed.



Ernest Theisinger's Doctor Pretorius gets his in Bride of Frankenstein (James Whale, 1935). Title by Shadowplay-ing David Cairns.

Flog Like an Egyptian

This slave-driving highborn Egyptian
was a sadist defying description
Surveying the Nile
each day he would smile
at the chance he could get a few whips in



Vincent Price as Baka, the whip-wielding master builder in The Ten Commandments (Cecil B. DeMille. 1956); with Debra Paget, Edward G. Robinson and John Derek. Image source: vincentprice.org

Gold, Frankenstein and Myrrh

There's no joy at the monster's nativity
No presents or signs of festivity
His mom was no virgin
but dad is a surgeon
Playing God is his favorite activity

David Cairns



Merry Christmas from the angry, torch-bearing mob at Limerwrecks!! Top: Boris Karloff in Bride of Frankenstein (James Whale, 1933), with masterful makeup by Jack Pierce; Above: Colin Clive and Karloff in Frankenstein (Whale, 1931). Author David Cairns is the mad doctor behind the horror film blog Shadowplay.

Grief--It's What's for Sinners

Insidious notions on sin
have burrowed down under my skin
I've Catholic guilt
right up to the hilt
self-loathing that eats from within

Racket to the Moon

The ranks of the faithful are swelling
but those aren't roses you're smelling
When you are implored
to buy for the Lord
T'ain't Jesus who's doing the selling

The Sin Crowd

Where did all this badness begin?
Way back in “original sin?"
Are we to believe
that Adam and Eve
have caused all the trouble we're in?

Twiddle-Dee Deity

At top of the Big Question list
the biggest is, "Does God exist?"
Or, facing unknown
are we all alone?
By asking, did He just get pissed?

It's Big Questions week at Limerwrecks.