Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Sis of Death

Usher's sensitive eardrums have heard
Ev'ry delicate whisper and word
His sister's voice boomed
When he had her entombed
And he still hears her since she's interred...

David Cairns

Vincent Price stars in House of Usher (Roger Corman, 1960).

Tuesday, August 30, 2011

Imitation of Lifeless

Poor Madeline Usher's condition
makes it look like she needs a mortician
Laid stiff in a crypt
her lid she's soon flipped,
fulfilling the fam'ly tradition

Myrna Fahey is ill-fated cataleptic Madeline Usher in House of Usher (Roger Corman, 1960).

Monday, August 29, 2011

Sister Packed

The answer to all of your woes
Isn't anything like you suppose
Don't nail that lid, mister
Upon your kid sister
Cause it won't be her final repose.

David Cairns

Vincent Price, Mark Damon and Myrna Fahey in House of Usher (Roger Corman, 1960).

Sunday, August 28, 2011

The Tsar of All the Ushers

The estate of the Ushers is cursed
It's awaiting a fate long rehearsed
According to plan
the lord of the clan
has a date in a swampland, submersed

Vincent Price is Roderick Usher, the last of the House of Usher (Roger Corman, 1960). This was the first in a series of eight adaptations of Edgar Allan Poe by director Roger Corman starring Vincent Price. Title by fallen David Cairns.

Saturday, August 27, 2011

A Fistful of Crawlers

Of tarantula's venom be wary
This arachnid's a menace and scary
When monstrously sized
the army's advised
to ask for a young Dirty Harry.

Tarantula (Jack Arnold, 1955), starring Leo G. Carroll, John Agar and Mara Corday, and an uncredited 25-year-old Clint Eastwood as a jet pilot that douses the title creature with napalm. Tarantula is crawling on Svengoolie, tonight on Me-TV. Title by giant-sized David Cairns.

Friday, August 26, 2011

Hitching Post-Grad

On the backroads his thumb he's been jerking
Hides his past at the dumps where he's working
Like the smile on his face
he's a guy out of place
In the shadows no wonder he's lurking

David Janssen is The Fugitive, and Lieutenant Gerard he is irking. It's always lonely on Fugitive Fridays at Limerwrecks. Image source: Richard Kimball, The Fugitive.

Thursday, August 25, 2011

Bold Type-Casting

When this show put old Price on the map
he was thrown ev'ry fright-movie scrap
Once type-cast, he owned it
No gripes, never phoned it
Even though once or thrice it was crap

Vincent Price may have chewed the scenery but he never walked through a part. Our Vincentennial tribute to the horror star will continue.

Wednesday, August 24, 2011

Buzz Offed

In this sequel, the parts of a guy
get switched with the bits from on a fly
And just as before,
the chump's feeling sore
But this time his enemies die

Vincent Price and Brett Halsey still can't work the bugs out of their matter-transporter in Return of the Fly (Edward Bernds, 1959). Thanks to David Cairns for tossing off yet another title.

Tuesday, August 23, 2011

Son of a Glitch

When a fly and a man exchange parts
it's one science-caused transfer that smarts
What made it occur
was a paid sabouteur
who, surprised by the fly-man, departs

Vincent Price, David Frankham and Brett Halsey in Return of the Fly (Edward Bernds, 1959). This time around the human-insect fusion is caused intenionally by a treacherous lab assistant as part of industrial espionage, and the resulting Man-Fly takes revenge on the spy and his partner. But just as before, Vincent Price's character is side-lined from the action. Thanks to David Cairns for the bitchin' title.

Monday, August 22, 2011

Rodental Treatment

Uncle Vinnie just shrugs like a sap
As a guinea pig's fused with a chap
But he quakes in his boots
When his nephew transmutes
To a shambling bug that eats crap.

David Cairns

Vincent Price in Return of the Fly (Edward Bernds, 1959). Image source: Monster Movie Music;

Sunday, August 21, 2011

Electroshock Scare-apy

It grows when it knows you are scared
So don't go to the show unprepared
Set your throat for a scream
at promotional scheme
if your row is electric'lly chaired

The Tingler
(William Castle, 1959). The Tingler was Vincent Price's second film with producer-director and all around cinema showman William Castle. Castle loved promotional gimmicks, and The Tingler featured "Percepto!", a tingling effect achieved by wiring selected theater seats to an electric motor that would buzz and vibrate. Image source: Monster Movie Music; Bearded Weirdo Reviews

Saturday, August 20, 2011


In Egypt, two pals who were chummy
did meet with a stale, ancient mummy
Exhumed from his tomb,
the ghoul spelled their doom--
but in hieroglyphs--mum's not a dummy


Abbott and Costello Meet the Mummy (Charles Lamont, 1955), airing tonight on Svengoolie on Me-TV. This was the 28th and final A&C film for Universal, and their routines were getting about as ancient as the pyramids. Title by Crypt-Keeper David Cairns.

Friday, August 19, 2011

Whistle Stop and Go

With Lieutenant Gerard in pursuit,
Kimble wends a circuitous route
He's grown rather wary,
and so, he won't tarry
He's spending the week, then he'll scoot

Another week, another town. David Janssen racks up the miles as Doctor Richard Kimble, The Fugitive. Fugitive Fridays keeps moving. Image source: Richard Kimball, The Fugitive.

Thursday, August 18, 2011

Tingle Bullet Theory

In The Tingler, a notable clip
is a scene where Vince goes on a trip
Is the actor allergic
to acid, lysergic?
It seems like his lobe's gonna flip

Norm Knott

Vincent Price in The Tingler (William Castle, 1959). Price plays a pathologist researching the physical manifestation of fear. He injects LSD to frighten himself. Image source: Gregory's Shock! Theater; Bearded Weird Reviews. For a terrific multi-frame breakdown of Price's freakout, visit Arbogast on Film. Our centennial tribute to Vincent Price continues.

Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Bed, Bloodbath and Beyond

If bathtime's too boring for you
Try soaking in deep crimson grue
Ablutions seem duller
Without Technicolor
Let red be your personal hue.

David Cairns

Vincent Price takes a bath in The Tingler (William Castle, 1959).

Tuesday, August 16, 2011

Tingle All the Way

She goes for a sit in the tub
For a soak and a bit of a scrub
But instead of some bubbles
She's headed for troubles
In a bloodbath that's literal, bub.

Deaf-mute Martha Higgins (Judith Evelyn) is scared into stimulating The Tingler (William Castle, 1959). This William Castle production starring Vincent Price is full of gimmicky effects, such as this striking use of color in an otherwise black-and-white movie. Image source: Bearded movie Reviews

Monday, August 15, 2011

Tingle White Female

Dr Chapin ain't much of a mingler
He's strange and his hobbies are singular
He murders his spouse
To inherit the house
And spend all of his time with his tingler

David Cairns

Vincent Price (Dr. Warren Chapin), Patricia Cutts (his wife, Isabel), Darryl Hickman and Pamela Lincoln in The Tingler (William Castle, 1959). The Tingler was Price's second film with producer-director and all around cinema showman William Castle. Our previous swing at Tingler is entitled Spinal Gollum. Image source: This Island Rod

Sunday, August 14, 2011


In this wild, wacky RKO version
Sinbad's son undergoes a conversion
Middle-Eastern no more
He's a mid-western bore
It's funny who Hughes casts as Persians.

David Cairns

Let's call it "tripe-casting". Dale Robertson stars as the Son of Sinbad (Ted Tetzlaff, 1955); with Sally Forrest. Produced by Howard "Hands-On" Hughes. Image source:

Saturday, August 13, 2011

The Mantis Who Came to Dinner

A giant-sized mantis is preying
on guys it dismantles while slaying
They try to destroy it
but only annoy it
That's why William Hopper is graying

Craig Stevens, Alix Talton and silver haired William Hopper battle the Deadly Mantis (Nathan Juran, 1957). It's hosted by Svengoolie on Me-TV this afternoon, and is followed tonight by The Mummy starring Boris Karloff.

Friday, August 12, 2011

A Touch of Class...Conflict

Kimble gets an assortment of jobs
Toils and sweats with the working class slobs
Though he never quite fits
with the everyday stiffs
They're still better than boring old snobs

Actor David Janssen was gainfully employed as The Fugitive, and there's a payday every week on Fugitive Fridays.

Thursday, August 11, 2011

Wham, Bam, Thank You Khayam

Son of Sinbad's a trifle grotesque
with its harem girls straight from burlesque
Vincent Price supplies ham
as Omar Khayam
But his co-stars are more statuesque.

David Cairns

Vincent Price is tentmaker Omar Khayyám, still working on his Rubáiyát, in Son of Sinbad (Ted Tetzlaff, 1955). With Mari Blanchard, stripper Lili St. Cyr and a bevy of beauties all under contract to producer Howard Hughes. Image source:;

Tuesday, August 9, 2011

Drop Deadly

Though ornate chandeliers fall and crash,
we're staying right here--for the cash
For ten thousand smackers
we'll fend off attackers,
and maybe an acid-bath splash

Carol Ohmart takes a dip in William Castle's House on Haunted Hill.

Monday, August 8, 2011

Slingshot Obit

With an ominous, spine-chilling wail
The skeleton slides on his rail
But the schoolkids take aim
at his skeletal frame,
and with popcorn his heinie assail

David Cairns

With his patented gimmick "Emergo", producer-director William Castle slid an inflatable skeleton out over audiences watching House on Haunted Hill (1959). Teenagers found it a ready target. Image source: Garbo Laughs

Sunday, August 7, 2011

Party Quavers

For a party I see you've all dressed
Your favors are each in a chest
We thought you'd have fun
with a coffin and gun,
when minus a bullet-proof vest

Howard Hoffman, Leona Anderson and Vincent Price in House on Haunted Hill (William Castle, 1959). Thanks to party planner David "Casket" Cairns for the title. Image source: Garbo Laughs.