Better Deader Than Lederer

Teutonic and tall, dark and harmful
Byronic, appallingly charmful
But the Hammer Films boom
Spelled glamor-boy's doom
With demonic love-dolls by the armful.

David Cairns

Francis Lederer is down for the Count in Return of Dracula (Paul Landres; 1958). This was released one month before the film that stole all of its thunder, Terence Fisher's Hammer production Dracula (US: Horror of Dracula, also 1958), released by Universal-International.

All-You-Can-Bleed Buffet

 

Drac escapes to a village that's small
Biting napes there he pillages all
When the veins have run dry
To attain new supply
Off he'll traipse, drink his fill at the mall.

Francis Lederer and Norma Eberhardt in The Return of Dracula (Paul Landres; 1958). Thanks to David Cairns for the edit.

Import/Neck-Sport

In caverns this charmer would lurk
So to travel as cargo's a perk
Through customs he'll sail
Feeling musty and stale
Then, ravenous, charge off berserk.

David Cairns

Francis Lederer is Bellac Gordal/Dracula in The Return of Dracula (Paul Landres; 1958).

Punched Drunks

These meatheads like boozing in bars
From beatings, their bruises have scars
In no time they clash
They throw down and smash
Defeated, the loser sees stars.

Bluto and Popeye compete in Blow Me Down! (Dave Fleischer; 1933). Title by punchy Donald B. Benson.

Francis the Stalking Ghoul

He preys like a leach, this imposter
Those he sways with his speech join his roster
Despite Francis's splendor
His finances grow slender
And he stays just to teach Jodie Foster.

David Cairns

Just like actor Francis Lederer, the vampire count migrates to America s in The Return of Dracula (Paul Landres; 1958). Fun fact: Francis Lederer was indeed Jodie Foster's drama teacher.

Day For Dwight

Go to guy for mad science-type fun
Prefers spiders and flies--hold the bun
Likes a castle or lab
A black mass would be fab!
Who knows why ol' Dwight Frye has a gun.

Remembering the birthday of a favorite among character actors, Dwight Frye (February 22, 1899 – November 7, 1943). Dwight Iliff Frye didn't only play lackeys in horror films., and by all accounts he was a normal guy. Title by odd fearing Donald B. Benson. Above: Frye is a rare book forger In Fast Company (Edward Buzzell;1938), here getting the drop on Louis Calhern. Below: Frye enjoys a couple of beers at the beach with his wife Laura, son Buddy, and mama with the dog.

Above the Fruited Vein

In a trunk he'll traverse the Atlantic
The old skunk finds his curse makes him frantic
Thus, when "necking" with dames
He bites, wrecks, rips and maims
This blood-junky's perversely romantic.

David Cairns

Dracula (Francis Lederer) moves his coffin to California, U.S.A. in Return of Dracula (Paul Landres; 1958). Title by fruitful Donald B.Benson.

No Country For Old Menaces

Drac will suck, and the cherry blood flows
Run amok, he will bury what grows   
Europe's virgins now tarts,
Vampire scourge then departs,
Tries to pluck an American rose.   

Old World Dracula come to America. Francis Lederer spooks Norma Eberhardt in The Return of Dracula (Paul Landres; 1958).

He Came to See the Bites

Europe's barren and blasted and meaner
Over There, Drac had fasted, grown leaner
But the hateful blood-beast
In the States has a feast
For American pastures are greener.

Surly Hack, Donald B. Benson, and David Cairns 

Dracula (Francis Lederer) hungers for California teenager Rachel (Norma Eberhardt) in The Return of Dracula (Paul Landres; 1958).

Craze Anatomy

This here fellow's not mincing or snobby
He's a hellraising, insolent swabbie
His two forearms are bloated
And what's more, we have noted
That his elbows and chin are both knobby.

Popeye flexes his sausages--er...um...elbows? Blow Me Down! (Dave Fleischer; 1933).

This Land Was Made For You to Bleed

Old World hack finds it tough to get dates
So he packs up a couple of crates
This elusive guy treks
To find juicier necks
And now Drac struts his stuff in the States.



Francis Lederer and Norma Eberhardt in The Return of Dracula (Paul Landres; 1958).

That Old Fang of Mine

From his sight girls quite rightly recoil
With delight he will bite and despoil
When the rascal is done
With his vascular fun
He'll alight and sleep tight on home soil.

Bela Lugosi returns to vampirism as Armand Tesla (Dracula in all but name). scaring the kiddies in The Return of the Vampire (Lew Landers; 1943). Title by old soul Donald B. Benson.

Frye ... Ain’t Got Nobody

One more Valentines Day with no lass
With no gal to make hay with, harass       
I can't score with a girl
Am I horrid? A churl?
I'm unbalanced, they say, and low class.

Dwight Frye as Karl in Bride of Frankenstein (James Whale;1935).Title by Donald B. Benson, who says, "I coulda been some body!" This is a special Wednesday edition of Dwight Frye-Days. Happy Valentines Day from the bleeding hearts at LimerWrecks.

Haemophage of Innocence

Things improve with time's passing, they say
You disprove that each lass that you slay
You prefer blood that's surgin'
From a curvy young virgin
So that you've got a classy buffet.

David Cairns

Drácula (Carlos Villarias) menaces Eva (Lupita Tovar) in Universal's Spanish-language version of Dracula (George Melford; 1931). What are YOU doing on Valentines Day?

Sartorial Bender

As a pestilence, Drac is deluxe
While we rest, he attacks and he sucks
All the woe, the lives wasted,
The type O he has tasted
Always dressed in a black cape and tux

Bela Lugosi dresses up as Dracula (Tod Browning; 1931).

Goil and Trouble

He'll eat foam manning decks in a squall
Makes his home in the next port of call
Try to win Popeye's cutie
His sweet skinny patootie
He'll crack domes and twist necks in a brawl.

Popeye ogles a pic of his best goil, Olive Oyl: I Never Changes My Altitude (Dave Fleischer; 1937).

Looking For Mister Good Brain

First time Fritz ever went to a school
He's a witless and bent-over ghoul
When it's plain that he fetched
A bad brain that is tetched
What a ditz! Henry sent out a fool.

Fritz (Dwight Frye) sneaks into a medical school to steal a brain in Frankenstein (James Whale, 1931). Dwight Frye-Day gets an education.

Housekeeping of Dracula

To this honey, Drac seems rather dapper
He's just hungry, and scheming to trap her
But he suffers a loss
When rebuffed with a cross
And, at sunrise, his dream hits the crapper.



Count Latos aka Dracula (John Carradine) takes a fancy to Milizia (Martha O'Driscoll) in House of Dracula (Erle C. Kenton; 1945). Apparently Bela Lugosi was not happy that Universal replaced him in the role of Dracula.

Blitzcreep

When strikes by the Reich brings him back    
He'd like a good bite in the sack. 
With werewolf as lackey
He's scary, but wacky
No icon, this night-fiend's not "Drac."

 

In The Return of the Vampire (Lew Landers; 1943), German bombing in England during WWII frees vampire Armand Tesla (Bela Lugosi). Andreas Obry (Matt Willis) is a werewolf under his control. Columbia Pictures originally intended this as a direct sequel to Dracula (1931), but when Universal threatened a plagiarism suit, Columbia changed the names of the characters to avoid any direct connection to Lugosi's earlier hit. Title by David Cairns, blitzed.

A Hungarian Ghoulash

Count Drac's on a queer sort of kick
He snacks on the nearest hot chick
But requesting a bite
Finds it best that he write
His accent's unclear it's so thick.  

Dracula (Bela Lugosi) and Mina (Helen Chandler) in Dracula (Tod Browning; 1931). Title by Donald B. Benson, strictly from hunger-y.

Baby Got Drac

This belle has Count Dracula fooled
He fell for her act and gets schooled
Thought he took her as bride
But she hooked him and lied
The hell-fiend in black's been out-ghouled!

Louise Allbritton is carried over the threshold by Lon Chaney Jr. as Count "Alucard", the incognito Son of Dracula (Robert Siodmak, 1943).

Blunt Farce Trauma

Pity Bluto, whose winning is fleeting.
Soon the brute on the chin takes a beating.
The sailor he's thumped
Prevails when he's pumped
And rebooted from spinach he's eating.

Popeye frustrates bully Bluto once again in I Eats My Spinach (Dave Fleischer, Seymour Kneitel [uncredited]; 1933).

Straighten Up and Fly, Dwight

The poor sap can't command their respect
Takes their crap, reprimands, and neglect
Wouldn't heed his existence
But they need his assistance
Perhaps if he'd stand more erect?

Edward van Sloan, John Boles, hunched Dwight Frye, Mae Clarke, and Colin Clive, in Frankenstein (James Whale; 1931). Title by upstanding Donald B. Benson.

The Val of Fears

Down staircases, shadowed and dreary
Move characters mad, lost or weary
Val Lewton productions
Are muted seductions
By terror that's black-clad and eerie.



Above: Val Lewton and director Mark Robson in 1945. Top: Dennis O'Keefe and Jean Brooks in The Leopard Man (Jacques Tourneur; 1943), produced by Lewton. Title by valley guy Donald B. Benson. Let us know if you have enjoyed our trip down Lewton Lane.