Wednesday, July 31, 2013
Of lycanthropy, showing the signs,
Larry, frantic and woebegone, whines
With his wobbly walk
The poor Monster should squawk
He was panned and lost most of his lines.
Béla Lugosi, Patric Knowles, Ilona Massey and Lon Chaney Jr, in Frankenstein Meets the Wolf Man (1943). Title by David Cairns, moanin' lowlife.
From the IMDb: When The Monster's dialogue was deleted, also removed were any references to The Monster being blind - a side-effect of Ygor's brain being implanted into The Monster at the end of The Ghost of Frankenstein. As a result, Lugosi's sleepwalker-like lumbering gait with arms outstretched is not explained and became the subject of ridicule. It also established the Frankenstein Monster-walk stereotype.
Tuesday, July 30, 2013
Once, Lugosi refused to play dumb
Now he knows he's a loser, a bum
He plays killers and brutes
Tries to fill Karloff's boots
Holds his nose, hits his cues, and grows numb.
Legend has it that Béla Lugosi turned down the role of The Monster in the 1931 Frankenstein, in part because there wasn't any dialog. When he finally played the character in Frankenstein Meets the Wolf Man, the Hungarian actor must have been chagrined to learn that all his lines had been cut from the final print.
Monday, July 29, 2013
He's so dull now, he's mainly a prop
In his skull, random brains they will plop
Just a body to shock
For some plodding mad doc...
Why not cull him, the pain has to stop!
The Monster looks like he just ate something unpleasant: Béla Lugosi in Frankenstein Meets the Wolf Man (Roy William Neill; 1943). Title by David Cairns, who keeps on giving at Shadowplay.
Sunday, July 28, 2013
The monster, jut-browed and big booted
Is to consonants loudly ill-suited
The test audience howls
At his messed-up, flawed vowels
In response to this crowd he gets muted.
Cutting Room Floor Plans
In the script, Bela's part had been speaking,
But was snipped through the art of sneak-peeking
With his accent too thick
He was cut to the quick
His lines stripped due to heartless critiquing.
After negative previews, Béla Lugosi's dialog was cut from Frankenstein Meets the Wolf Man (1943).
Saturday, July 27, 2013
His flat head's monster art carved by chisel
He was dead, now he's starting to sizzle
But this leader in fear
Will recede to the rear
And such dreadful, dull parts help him fizzle.
The monster (Béla Lugosi) has little to do in Frankenstein Meets the Wolf Man (1943). Title by undiminished David Cairns.
Friday, July 26, 2013
In a bind, dying Ygor prepared
That his mind and the Monster were paired
In this cracked masquerade
Both this actor portrayed
Now combined, it's Lugosi, but squared.
In The Ghost of Frankenstein (1942), Béla Lugosi played Ygor, who had his brain transplanted into the Monster, played by Lon Chaney. In that film's sequel, Frankenstein Meets the Wolf Man (1943), Lugosi plays the Monster with the brain of Ygor (pictured). This was convenient, as the Monster was supposed to speak with Ygor's voice, which had been dubbed into Chaney's monster in the previous film. But a preview audience disapproved of the Monster speaking with Lugosi's Hungarian accent, and all his dialog was cut. Clear?
Title by multi-purpose David Cairns.
Thursday, July 25, 2013
No surprise old Lugosi's so crabby
He despises roles lowly and shabby
In this freakish film "Meet"
He's so weak on his feet
The guy lies half the show on a slabby.
Béla Lugosi plays the Monster in Frankenstein Meets the Wolf Man (Roy William Neill; 1943). Image source: Doctor Macro
Wednesday, July 24, 2013
A tag-team of villains unholy
Or a quagmire that's killing you slowly?
It seems purged of all taste
Somewhat turgidly paced
And the shaggy one's film, almost solely.
Larry Talbot, the Wolf Man (Lon Chaney Jr), dominates the show, pushing the Monster (Béla Lugosi) into the background, in Frankenstein Meets the Wolf Man (Roy William Neill; 1943).
Tuesday, July 23, 2013
From a chill the big fella awakens
He looks ill, a mere shell God's forsaken
Once quite vital, roles plumb,
Now he's sightless and dumb
Through the mill, and to hell he's been taken.
Béla Lugosi's Monster thaws out, then takes a backseat to Lon Chaney's Larry Talbot/Wolf Man: Frankenstein Meets the Wolf Man (Roy William Neill; 1943). After this humiliation, the Monster never recovered his gravitas at Universal.
Monday, July 22, 2013
One's a schizo who bays at full moon
Made from bits, one's a crazed, ghoulish goon
When their paths cross, these guys
Show their wrath and fur flies
And the ditz swam away with the loon.
David Cairns with Surly Hack
Hey, diddle diddle! At the end of Frankenstein Meets the Wolf Man (Roy William Neill; 1943), the Wolf Man battles The Monster -- until a flood from an exploded dam engulfs them.
Sunday, July 21, 2013
A once frightening twosome was paired
And one title they gruesomely shared
'Twas the studio's theory
That scare duos boost eerie,
But this nightmare is ghoulish-impaired.
"MONSTERS CLASH!" promised the ballyhoo, and audiences lined up for Frankenstein Meets the Wolf Man (Roy William Neill; 1943). One more title by David Cairns of Shadowplay.
Saturday, July 20, 2013
In the skirmish of stitches and paw,
Seems the furry one's itching to gnaw
But, as canines he flashes,
The re-brained one just smashes
The cur with a fist to the jaw.
Monsters clash when Béla Lugosi and Lon Chaney Jr star in Frankenstein Meets the Wolf Man (Roy William Neill; 1943).
Friday, July 19, 2013
Telling Lon that he ought to be spayed,
Bela's Monster makes off with the maid
Next, the two of them tussle,
Flexing gruesome, hewn muscle,
Till, upon them, the waters cascade.
The stunt doubles of Lon Chaney Jr, Ilona Massey, and Béla Lugosi have at it in the climax to Frankenstein Meets the Wolf Man (Roy William Neill; 1943). Title by fiendishly clever David Cairns.
Thursday, July 18, 2013
When the mute and the beast meet at last
The dispute should at least be a blast
But the foes hear a BLAM!
Someone blows up the dam!
And the brutes get deceased -- it's half-assed.
Béla Lugosi is The Monster, Lon Chaney Jr is the Wolf Man, in Frankenstein Meets the Wolf Man (1943). As originally shot, The Monster was not mute. At the end of the previous film in the series, he had the brain and voice of Ygor, a character also played by Lugosi. But preview audiences for Meets apparently didn't respond well to The Monster speaking with a Hungarian accent, and so his dialog was cut.
Wednesday, July 17, 2013
These hombres seem evenly matched
One embalmed, cleaved, and then reattached
One hairy of feature
Once Larry, now creature
With a bomb blast their evil's dispatched.
The Monster (Béla Lugosi) squares off with the Wolf Man (Lon Chaney Jr) in a promo pic for Frankenstein Meets the Wolf Man (1943).
Tuesday, July 16, 2013
There's heck-all for the monster to do
In this squalid, wreck-haunted milieu
He's so moribund, placid
Looking stunned, lying flaccid
Like he's stalled, or his neck's lost a screw.
The Monster (Béla Lugosi) is slab-bound through much of Frankenstein Meets the Wolf Man (Roy William Neill; 1943).
Monday, July 15, 2013
He won't stop, though not steady of gait
And the top of his head is a plate
He's the monster, redux
Stuck in nonsense that sucks
One more sloppy retread, made cut-rate.
Béla Lugosi is The Monster, terrifying villagers with his silly walk, in Frankenstein Meets the Wolf Man (Roy William Neill; 1943). David Cairns wins as title-master, walking away.
Sunday, July 14, 2013
When unreeling this screw-loose legato,
These two feel like they're losing the lotto
Gypsy curse, Gothic set,
How much worse could it get?
How to deal? Drink some booze and get blotto.
Béla Lugosi and Lon Chaney Jr are strapped to a slab in Frankenstein Meets the Wolf Man (Roy William Neill; 1943). With non-monstrous Ilona Massey and Patric Knowles. Title by hiss majesty, David Cairns.
Saturday, July 13, 2013
Someone shrieks, and their hearts start to sink
Playing freaks, all the parts start to stink
In a rut they are stuck
Monster mutts run amok
One more sequel, they'll start taking drink.
Béla Lugosi and Lon Chaney Jr play the Monster and Larry Talbot, the Wolf Man, in Frankenstein Meets the Wolf Man (1943).
Friday, July 12, 2013
Catatonic and green in the wattle,
Is the monster now keen on the bottle?
Is the wolf-man's sobriety
Now a source of dubiety?
Are they chronic, on vino full-throttle?
In Frankenstein Meets the Wolf Man (Roy William Neill; 1943), both Lawrence Talbot, aka the Wolf Man (Lon Chaney Jr), and Frankenstein's Monster (Béla Lugosi) look like they could use a drink.
Thursday, July 11, 2013
Larry Talbot's a bore, then grows hairier
As a mauler, transformed, he's much merrier
And the Monster's a lunk
Carries on as if drunk
All in all, this time more isn't scarier.
The Wolf Man, (Lon Chaney Jr), the Monster (Béla Lugosi), and Elsa Frankenstein (Ilona Massey) strike a pose in a stagey publicity still for Frankenstein Meets the Wolf Man (Roy William Neill; 1943).
Wednesday, July 10, 2013
When you're adding Lugosi's mad mind
To the addled, sad monster you'll find
There's a nauseous resemblance
That causes remembrance
Of that baddie and blacksmith, crook-spined.
David Cairns with Surly Hack
Béla Lugosi plays The Monster in Frankenstein Meets the Wolf Man (1943). At the end of The Ghost of Frankenstein, the previous film in the series, the big guy received a brain transplant from Ygor, the former blacksmith with a broken neck, a character who was also played by Lugosi. Not confusing at all, is it?
Tuesday, July 9, 2013
The big lug is, no doubt, on parole
Robbers dug him from out of a hole
Having died, he offends
Would-be brides and his friends,
And a hug the large lout can't cajole.
Ilona Massey is Baroness Elsa Frankenstein, and Béla Lugosi plays an unlovable Monster in Frankenstein Meets the Wolf Man (Roy William Neill; 1943). Title by somebody named David Cairns.
Monday, July 8, 2013
For the bulk of this cheese he's inert
A great hulk, freezer-burned, un-alert
He just stays in the lab
Like some clay, on a slab
In a sulk -- will he please be more pert?
In Frankenstein Meets the Wolf Man (Roy William Neill; 1943), Lon Chaney's Lawrence Talbot/Wolf Man is almost the whole show. Thawed from ice, Béla Lugosi's Monster is little more than furniture.
Sunday, July 7, 2013
Flap that tops off his mind-box is flat
If he drops by, he finds that folks scat
When a Wolf Man befriends him,
Arms he fully extends him:
The brain-swap's left him blind as a bat.
Lon Chaney Jr and Béla Lugosi pose for Frankenstein Meets the Wolf Man (Roy William Neill; 1943). Title by always hell-pful David Cairns.
Saturday, July 6, 2013
"My quietus I'd make," cries poor Laurence,
As he cites gypsy lore with with abhorrence
For this cursed one is willing
For a merciful killing
His gastritis refluxes in torrents.
All but mad in this raving fantasia
Mr Talbot had craved euthanasia
This is no Transylvania
But Doc Knowles says "I'll drain ya!"
Call him nuts, but the script's even crazier.
BLAME IT ON MY EUTHANASIA
The doc's patient is surely quite sick
On occasion, is cursed with film shtick
First he howls at the moon
Then he growls like a loon
Euthanasia should cure him, and quick!
Gypsy cursed, as a beast he sees red
As he's nursed, he seeks peace from the dread
"Final rest!" Larry pleads --
A request no one heeds --
What is worse, they release him, instead.
Larry Talbot (Lon Chaney Jr) seeks an end to his curse; willing to help is Dr. Mannering (Patric Knowles): Frankenstein Meets the Wolf Man (Roy William Neill; 1943).
Friday, July 5, 2013
When a virgin's the first one to die
The whole burg's in an uproar, oh my!
Local jerks there all gather,
Getting worked in a lather,
At the urging of upstart, Dwight Frye.
Above, right: Local yokel Rudi (Dwight Frye) stirs up the crowd in Frankenstein Meets the Wolf Man (Roy William Neill; 1943). Top: Tavern owner Vazec (Rex Evans) carries the body of his daughter, Margareta (Martha Vickers).
Thursday, July 4, 2013
Larry's rattled, the moon makes him so
It's that satellite's lunatic glow
Through the night he can lope
Like a right lycanthrope
And then battle some goon blow-for-blow.
That goon being Frankenstein's Monster, of course. Lon Chaney Jr is Larry Talbot, the "Wolf Man", in Frankenstein Meets the Wolf Man (Roy William Neill; 1943). Mike Oldfield, anyone?
Wednesday, July 3, 2013
By a bite from a werewolf he's screwed
Now, at night, he grows hair and acts rude
At the moon likes to howl
On the lunar-light prowl
With his plight, "bad" is Larry's pet mood.
Lon Chaney Jr is Larry Talbot, the Wolf Man, here in a publicity shot for Frankenstein Meets the Wolf Man (Roy William Neill; 1943).
Tuesday, July 2, 2013
Like batteries, monsters recharge
With a ZAP! into trouble they barge
They slip and they stumble,
Then trip in a tumble,
Their boots a few sizes too large.
Béla Lugosi as The Monster, and Lon Chaney Jr as Larry Talbot, the Wolf Man, in Frankenstein Meets the Wolf Man (Roy William Neill; 1943). Lugosi originated The Monster's famous hands-out stagger in this film. This was due to the character's blindness, a condition he was left with at the end of the preceding film in the series, The Ghost of Frankenstein. All references to blindness were cut from the final print, but the lumbering walk caught on.
Monday, July 1, 2013
On his best days, impaired by despair,
Merry festivals, Larry can't bear
Both his hands he is wringing
He can't stand all the singing
When depressed by his garish new hair.
Larry Talbot, the "Wolf Man" (Lon Chaney Jr) grabs the Festival Singer (Adia Kuznetzoff) in Frankenstein Meets the Wolf Man (Roy William Neill; 1943). Title by ill-feted David Cairns.