Saturday, October 31, 2009

Mass-Scare-a



They're slimy or pasty or hairy

so make-up for monsters will varyBig bolts in the neck
or hairdos from heck

The thing these things share is they're scary



Another thing they share is Universal Studios' make-up artist
extraordinaire, Jack Pierce, seen here applying his magic to
Lon Chaney Jr (top) and Boris Karloff. Make yourself into amonster and scare the kiddies. Happy Halloween!

Friday, October 30, 2009

Cerebrummed Out


How can I say this in a kind line?
These monsters contained not one fine mind
The docs tried their best
but feebly confessed
they could not create a Frank Einstein

Death be Not Shroud



By torch bearing mobs he was fried
He blew himself up with his bride
His ends were unequaled
but Frankenstein sequeled
and therefore, he'd not really died

Each screenwriter tried to devise
a clever and monstrous demise
But viewers were certain
at each closing curtain
the lumbering lug never dies

Ygor coaxes the monster from the sulfur pit: Bela Lugosi and
Lon Chaney, Jr. in
Ghost of Frankenstein (Erle C. Kenton, 1942)
Photo courtesy of
Monster Hunter.

Thursday, October 29, 2009

House Crawls



The yelling and screaming grows loud
Inside of the house there's a crowd
To Wolf and hunched back,
Add monster and Drac
It's more than the health code allowed.


House of Frankenstein (Erle C. Kenton, 1944). This is where I should link to a song by Crowded House. Photos, from top: Boris Karloff as the mad doctor, with Glenn Strange as the monster (Doctor Macro); Karloff and John Carradine as Dracula; Strange, Karloff and Lon Chaney Jr. as Larry Talbot, aka the Wolf Man. You may recall Glenn Strange as bartender Sam Noonan on the long-running Gunsmoke television show.

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

When Hairy Met Pale-y



It certainly ain't a "meet cute"
'tween monster and Wolf Man, hirsute
With grunting and growling
and at-the-moon howling
I'd call their acquaintance "meet brute"


Lon Chaney, Jr. is the Wolfman, and Bela Lugosi plays the monster
in Frankenstein Meets the Wolfman (Roy William Neill, 1943).
Photos:Top: Shadow Clad; Middle: The Grim Cellar; Below: Dr. Macro

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Leopold and Lobe



Mad doctors will never go far
without a fresh brain in a jar
The mind is the feature
without which their creature
will find its IQ is sub par

Ghost of Frankenstein (Erle C. Kenton, 1942)

Monday, October 26, 2009

Playing a Hunch-back



The ghost of the doc implores son
to finish the job he'd begun:
Replace monster's brain
with one that is sane
But to Igor a bad brain's more fun




Lon Chaney Jr. as the Monster, Bela Lugosi, Lionel Atwill and Cedric Hardwicke in The Ghost of Frankenstein (Erle C. Kenton, 1942). Top photo: Shadow Clad

Sunday, October 25, 2009

Father's Brittle Dividend




To father's old home the son came
to try and restore their good name

Thought Ygor, "What fun!
Like father, like son
We're back in the old monster game!"



Boris Karloff, Bela Lugosi and Basil Rathbone in
Son of Frankenstein
(Rowland V. Lee, 1939).

Saturday, October 24, 2009

Blind Man's Puff



The monster's afraid of a match
On fire he fears he might catch
His friend, who is kind
appears to be blind
to danger that roofing is thatch

O.P. Heggie and Karloff in Bride of Frankenstein (James Whale, 35)

Friday, October 23, 2009

Soupy Sales in the Sunset


His countenance filled with flung pies
brought laughter-filled tears to young eyes
He brought down the house
by dancing "The Mouse"
(Paul Reubens adapted Soup's guise)

Soupy Sales, R.I.P.

Bachelor Flat-top



The monster, who should have been toast
survived, and by love was engrossed
So under the knife
they made him a wife
his love-sickness miss-diagnosed



Colin Clive, Elsa Lanchester, Boris Karloff and Ernest
Theisiger in The Bride of Frankenstein (James Whale,
1935). Photos: Doctor Macro and Frankensteinia. To read
an earlier Bride limerick on Limerwrecks, click here.

.

Thursday, October 22, 2009

Little Lady in the Lake



The monster was taking a break
and played with a girl by a lake
Arcadian scene
soon turned Halloween

And now the town's holding her wake

Frankenstein (James Whale, 1931)

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Side of the Monster



His plight is pathetic and sad
It isn't his fault that he's bad
He's hounded and burned
and, by his bride, spurned
Can't blame him for getting so mad



Boris Karloff in Frankenstein (James Whale, 1931)

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Puttin' on the Fritz



Tormented by hunchback named Fritz
the monster's new life is the pits
Afraid of a scorch
from fiery torch
He longs to get Fritz in his mitts


Photos: Doctor Macro and Frankensteinia. Boris Karloff
and Dwight Frye in Frankenstein (James Whale, 1931).

Monday, October 19, 2009

Prometheus Unsound



Doc Frankenstein went to great pains
to prove after death life remains
To follow his thesis
stitched body from pieces
and then all he needed was brains



The doctor now dared to play god
giving life with a lightning charged rod
But plans went awry
when bad brain supply
created a lumbering clod



To greatness the doc had aspired
but down in the muck he was mired
The monster he made
did not make the grade
and then, in a windmill, expired



Welcome to a Frankenstein Fortnight of fright, where we
chronologically crawl through the castle canon to Halloween.
We're just one small part of the Countdown to Halloween
that's running all over the place throughout October. Thanks
to Backthrow and Norm for their help behind the scenes.
Pics: Boris Karloff, Colin Clive and Dwight Frye in the mon-
ster daddy of them all, Frankenstein (James Whale, 1931).

Bela the Pall



In Dracula's cape, nice and cozy
sleeps Hungary's Bela Lugosi
As thespian, he
was doomed to grade "Z"
and films of Ed Wood, not Joe Losey



Tomorrow is the birthday of horror star Bela Lugosi. Let's all
hoist a glass of the red and wish him a happy and haunted one.
Top: Lugosi as Dracula. Above: Lugosi puts the bite on Vampira.
That is Lugosi, isn't it?

Sunday, October 18, 2009

Timm-Id-ity



This Frankenstein's monster has pals
who all have a weakness for gals
Especially those
exposed in such clothes

as shredded, diaphanous veils

Illustration © Bruce Timm 2009

Saturday, October 17, 2009

Frankenline



The monster, in shadow and line
has never been rendered so fine
With singular skill
he's inked with a quill
as masters of horror combine



A match made in horror heaven: Mary Shelley's
Frankenstein, illustrated by
Berni Wrightson.


Illustrations © Berni Wrightson 2009

Friday, October 16, 2009

One More Thing...



A frog leaps from log into pond
A snake spirals down from a frond
A heron takes flight
and turtles, in fright
all flee from the thing from beyond


Swamp Thing by Berni Wrightson
Swamp Thing is
© and trademark DC Comics 2009

Thursday, October 15, 2009

Love Me or Leaf Me



The Swamp Thing stood hunched in the door
a horror to former amore
As wife to a plant
she'd love him, but can't
She's human, and can't bear a spore

Berni Wrightson's cover art for House of Secrets #92, which
introduced
Wrightson and Len Wein's Swamp Thing. Much
later in
the Swamp Thing series, writer Alan Moore figured
out a way for Swampy to bear fruit.
Swamp Thing TM and © DC Comics 2009.

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Shadows Master


In corners where cobwebbing clings
his shadows hide horrible things
Each pen and brush stroke
the Gothic evokes
Of moodiness Wrightson's the king




More than any other comics artist that emerged in the 1970s,
Berni Wrightson carried on the grand tradition of EC comics.
The artistic heir to 'Ghastly' Graham Ingels, Wrightson's style
also contains equal measures of fellow EC alums Jack Davis and
Frank Frazetta.


All art by Berni Wrightson. Top: Jennifer, written by Bruce Jones;
House of Secrets cover and The Shadow ad for DC; Early comics page.

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Past Balls

The haunt of Octobers of olde
the field named for Wrigley's grown cold
Faint echoes from bats
of men who wear spats
who late in the season don't fold

This season for Cubbies is toast
As always, they're missing the "post"
There's curses and theories
why Cubs won't host series
They ought to just give up the ghost

Each year the Cubs try to remold
Each year the fan's hope is fool's gold
But millionaire fans
hatch bankruptcy plans:
The team to a diehard's been sold

If you like baseball and poetry, you ought to visit
James Finn Garner's great site, Bard Ball.

Lucky Pike Means Brine Tobacco

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It seems that this fish likes to smoke
a habit that makes his gills choke
I hate to pick nit
but how's it stay lit?
His brand must be one that won't soak


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Trigger and Baron Barracuda on the 60s children's TV show,
Diver Dan.
The title "Lucky Pike" was Backthrow's, and I
embellished it. Here are Backthrow's alternate titles for this
limerick:
Puffer Fish, Harbor Lights, Smoke on the Water,
A Sick Guppy, Low Char, (or Low Gar), Hali-butts, and
Fishing Hack-le.