Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Bedbuggery



The bedbugs come crawling at night
Make sure that your prayers you recite
Spray Deet on your sheet
(they eat little feet)
and pull up the covers real tight!

Former Chicagoan Paul Fricke has written and drawn a spiffy new children's book, Night of the Bedbugs. The book is kid friendly, and not nearly as scary as this limerick. Read a preview, as well as play games and other fun stuff at bedbugsmania.com

Night of the Bedbugs © copyright
2010 Paul Fricke. All Rights Reserved

Sunday, June 27, 2010

Serial's Killer



The doc's building an army, robotic
And has killed to be ruler, despotic
The U.S. of A.
Held under his sway...
He's a villain most unpatriotic.


Robert Wilcox is the heroic and hooded "Copperhead", and Eduardo Ciannelli is the villainous and Mysterious Doctor Satan (William Whitney, John English, 1940). Originally written as a vehicle for Superman, Doctor Satan is considered to be one of the best of Republic's cliffhanger adventure serials. To carry out his nefarious plan, all Dr. Satan needs is to steal the professor's remote control device. And then...

Saturday, June 26, 2010

Dada Entry



I've heard that the Devil wears Prada
but word is His Darkness wears nada
He's hotter than hell
and dresses like, well...
a stripper in Vegas, Nevada

Friday, June 25, 2010

Swizzle Styx



Your bar bill's in permanent ink
Of sulfur the bartenders stink
You've had quite a ball
but now it's last call
They've mixed you one helluva drink

A frame from Aventurera ( Alberto Gout, 1950), thanks to Six Martinis and the Seventh Art.

Thursday, June 24, 2010

Belle and Damnation



They're deviling poor Dudley Moore
exposing temptations galore

Confronted by "Lust"
it's heaven or bust

He finds that it's hard to ignore




As "Lillian Lust", Raquel Welch has Dudley Moore Bedazzled (Stanley Donen, 1967), a Faustian Mod-era comedy written by Moore and Peter Cook.

Wednesday, June 23, 2010

Saturday Night FIFA


Mejia/AP

Fanatics from far away lands
wear costumes and chant from the stands
But 'merican fellas
don't blare vuvuzelas
or get why they can't use their hands


The vuvuzela is the plastic horn that's heard droning throughout soccer matches in South Africa. Apparently the sound is driving the French players crazy.

I must be un-American, because I've contracted World Cup fever. USA just beat Algeria in overtime, winning Group C, and advancing to the final 16. Meanwhile, North Korea is rumored to have hired Chinese actors to portray Korean fans at the Cup. You don't get intrigue like that at your so-called "World" Series. Thanks to Backthrow for the title.

Catch As Scratch Can



A devil, to knot-headed hick
lends cash and a hot-blooded chick
The bargain comes due,
rube whimpers boo-hoo
and hires a lawyer who's slick




The Devil and Daniel Webster (William Dieterle, 1941), aka All That Money Can Buy (andl other titles). Walter Huston steals the show as the devilish Mr. Scratch, Simone Simon is lovely as temptress Belle Dee, and James Craig is a lunkhead as farmer Jabez Stone. I wouldn't say he sinks the film, but it's hard to identify with him. The film's structure doesn't help, as he spends most of the story as a lout, then gets bailed out by Edward Arnold (not pictured), excellent as lawyer Daniel Webster. Thanks to Backthrow for the title. Photos: The guy doesn't know film from a hole in his butt (he gave up on Lubitsch's The Shop Around the Corner after 9 minutes), but he takes a great screen cap. Love that flaming carrot in the top pic.

Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Faust-about




If power and wealth is your goal
the Devil pays well for a soul
You'll live like a king
and play out the string
till one day you're shoveling coal


Faust (F.W. Murnau, 1926) stars Emil Jannings as Mephisto and Gösta Ekman as Faust.

Monday, June 21, 2010

Tricky Nick



Your signature's needed to seal
a devilish kind of a deal
For power and sex
a soul he expects
Just sign on the line for Nick Beal


Political deals with the devil are made by Thomas Mitchell, Ray Milland and Audrey Totter in Alias Nick Beal (John Farrow, 1949). Limerwrecks is going to the devil.

Saturday, June 19, 2010

Obsessive Repulsive



He draws it again and again
This isn't cartooning as zen
Same head with big ears
for years upon years
He's waiting for you to say "when"

Thursday, June 17, 2010

Birthdazed

There was an old artist named Barta
As old as ye olde Magna Carta
His comics were styled
when he was a child
and now he's a surly old farta

Season's Heatings



I march to the beat of a drummer
who hangs up his sticks in the summer
When it's sunny and warm
outdoors is the norm
and writing inside is a bummer

It's turned tropical here in Chicago and we're taking a break from the daily limerick grind. But don't worry, we'll still post--just not every single day. And, just like last year, we'll be taking part in the Countdown to Halloween all through October. Have a great summer, Limerwreckers.

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

Al Williamson, R.I.P.



His comics are filled with a joy
for strips that he loved as a boy
He rockets past stars
'round Mongo and Mars
and calls to his heroes, "Ahoy!"


Al Williamson was one of comics' great romantic artists. He was also one of the nicest and most generous of gents that I've been lucky enough to meet. Happy trails, Al.
From Heritage magazine, 1972: Williamson's cover pencils of Flash Gordon and crew, and Berni Wrightson's portrait of Williamson.

Lionel Jeffries, R.I.P.



He lost all his hair at nineteen*
and polished his head to a sheen
As character actor
no hair was a factor
in playing much older on screen

*According to the IMDb.




British character actor and director Lionel Jeffries passed away in February. Jeffries played Dick Van Dyke's father in Chitty Chitty Bang Bang (68), though he was actually six months younger than Van Dyke.
Known mostly for his comedic roles, his many films include Stage Fright (1950), The Colditz Story (54), Lust for Life (57), Two-Way Stretch and The Trials of Oscar Wilde (both 1960), and First Men in the Moon (64). In the 1970s Jeffries began writing and directing family films. The most successful of these was his first, The Railway Children (70). Photos: In Murder Ahoy! (64); As director, with Diana Dors on the set of The Amazing Mr. Blunden (72).

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Astro-Naughty

r

A sleazy sci-fiction wet dream
it's cheesy, the plot is a scream
Jane sheds ev'ry trace
of clothing in space
to please her then-husband, Vadim



Jane Fonda loses her clothes and her dignity as Barbarella (Roger Vadim, 1968). Vadim, her director/husband, had previously married and similarly exploi--er, promoted--Brigitte Bardot.

Monday, June 14, 2010

Carole-ing



Both witty and wacky was Carole
So pretty she drove fellas feral
As screwball and beauty
she'd do double-duty
and have us all over a barrel


Top: Comedienne Carole Lombard never looked lovelier than in Hands Across the Table (Mitchell Leisen, 1935); Above: Kicking John Barrymore in Twentieth Century (Howard Hawks,1934), from Doctor Macro.

Sunday, June 13, 2010

Bummer of Love



The sixties seemed cool at the time
Both peace and free love were sublime
But drug-addled passions
wreaked horrible fashions
How else to explain all the mime?

Mime spectators at a mimed tennis-match, from Blow-Up (Michelangelo Antonioni, 1966).

Saturday, June 12, 2010

Friend or Faux 2

A friend is a friend without fail
True friendship will never go stale
A friend who's not fake
will bake you a cake
and sneak you a saw into jail

Friday, June 11, 2010

Let George Skew It



George Sanders perfected the cad
The best that the cinema's had
With timing and taste
to virtue laid waste
We're all better off he was bad


Another one for the Siren.

Thursday, June 10, 2010

Kay Fwancis



Kay Francis, most lovely of stars
would prance across ritzy boudoirs
In haute couture dresses
this lady confesses
to trouble pronouncing her "Rs"


Francis was good-humored enough to poke fun at herself in Living on Velvet (Frank Borzage, 1935), in which she gamely recites "Around the rugged rocks, the ragged rascals ran." This one is for the Siren. Photos: Doctor Macro and She Blogged by Night.

Wednesday, June 9, 2010

Pigeon Toe-Tagged



The stoolie gets paid for her gab
To cops about crooks she will blab
But dropping a dime
on communist slime
this pigeon winds up on a slab



Stool pigeon Thelma Ritter is saving up for her tombstone in Pickup on South Street (1953). A tale of love and honor among thieves that would have been sentimental glop in the hands of a Damon Runyon, or flag-waving anti-commie propaganda by almost anyone else, Pickup is made tough and truly moving by writer and director Sam Fuller. Pics: top: Nighthawk News; above: My Life in Movies.

Tuesday, June 8, 2010

Sans Simian



They're hunting a big hairy ape
that recently made its escape
And speaking of large
Ray Burr is in charge
as a guy with a similar shape


Gorilla at Large ( Harmon Jones, 1954) is a color horror/murder mystery set in an amusement park, originally released in 3-D near the end of the early fifties 3-D cycle. Above: Lee J. Cobb, Raymond Burr and Ann Bancroft. To that already impressive cast add star Cameron Mitchell and Lee Marvin in a supporting part. Top (Starlet Showcase): Charlotte Austin, Peter Whitney and George Matthews as "Goliath", the gorilla. Matthews had previously donned a gorilla suit in another depthie, Robot Monster.

Monday, June 7, 2010

Loose Goose



The eye of the goose would meander
She first took a look, then a gander
All over the gaggle
tongues started to waggle
She'd sue, but the truth isn't slander

Art © Jim Siergey 2010

Sunday, June 6, 2010

Lambo



A shepherd, afraid that a fox
would decimate all of his flocks,
decided one day
to join NRA
and arm all his sheep with new Glocks

Words and art © Jim Siergey 2010

Saturday, June 5, 2010

Shaken, Not Furred



A chi-chi new drink is chinchilla
It's great with a pinch of vanilla
Just blend it up nice
and serve over ice
It's sweeter than fresh squeezed gorilla

Add dash (or perhaps a scintilla?)
of shavings of genus cyrilla
Then kick off your shoes,
add favorite booze
and drink in Peruvian villa

Friday, June 4, 2010

Have a Cow, Man



It jumped o'er the moon like a scud
and landed on Earth on its cud
The farmer now shudders
when squeezing its udders
The pail fills with buttery blood

Art © Jim Siergey 2010

Thursday, June 3, 2010

Fur-niture



It's warm but it's itchy and scary
I'd sit but my ass will not tarry
Its arms end in claws
and legs rest on paws
This chair is too bear-like and hairy

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Sheep Trick



Now, what in the world have we here?
A three-headed sheep seat? Oh, dear.
I once made a blunder
in one when Down Under
Both chair and my hair got a shear

© Jim Siergey 2010

Tuesday, June 1, 2010

Keeping the Paste

A thoroughbred champ, through-and-through
The horse ran so fast that it flew
But when it grew old
the stallion was sold
and quickly was turned into glue