The Star Dispatched

On deadline they typeset a blurb
A headline, pure hype to disturb
One gorilla is real
One's a kill-crazy heel
Both ready to wipe out a burb

Well, even the "real" gorilla is a guy in a suit. The Gorilla (Allan Dwan; 1939) is a comedy horror film, and stars the Ritz Brothers, Anita Louise, Patsy Kelly, Lionel Atwill and Béla Lugosi.

Gorilla-Crush

A tropic malaise strikes R. Burr
Lycanthropic? It's raising some fur!
He's a brute straight from Hell
Monkey suit, XXL
In this flop pic his best line is "Grrr!"

David Cairns



Married to Barbara Payton, most men would go ape--even Raymond Burr turns simian in Bride of the Gorilla (1951).

Urban Gorilla

Though a shock, from the grave he's released
When a doc puts his brain in a beast
As a primate he wreaks
All the vengeance he seeks
'Cause in schlock one can't stay long deceased.

Yet another b-movie with a gangster's-brain-in-a-gorilla plot: Ellen Drew and friend in The Monster and the Girl (Stuart Heisler; 1941). Our title was transplanted from David Cairn's Shadowplay.

Make Way For Gemora

You'll find all us primates in cages  
Confined there, we fly into rages
It's then we great apes
From pens make escapes...  
And wind up decried on front pages. 

Charles Gemora plays Sultan, the ape in Phantom of the Rue Morgue (Roy Del Ruth; 1954). Male way for David Cairns, writer of clever titles.

Jungle Cling

He's spry and he's strong and he's hairy
And the primate is longing to marry
The lady resists him
But apes have a system
And apply ol' King Kong's "mash and carry."

"Sultan" the ape (Charles Gemora) carries off Jeanette (Patricia Medina) in Phantom of the Rue Morgue (Roy Del Ruth; 1954).

Belle Ringer

He'd mate with this mademoiselle,
But dating her doesn't go well
He's buff but no prince,
She's tough to convince,
And a cage at the zoo's a hard sell.

"Sultan", the ape (Charles Gemora) calls on Jeanette, the woman (Patricia Medina) in Phantom of the Rue Morgue (Roy Del Ruth; 1954). The Countdown to Halloween continues across the interwebs!

Model T & A

A sicko hits France where it hurts 
Skips victims in pants, slaughters skirts
In 3D and in color
--Your TV looks much duller--
This flick's so enhanced that blood spurts!



A violent murder in an artist's garret is committed by the Phantom of the Rue Morgue (Roy Del Ruth; 1954). LimerWrecks is just one of the many blogs joining in the Coundown to Halloween.

Just a Gorilla Who Can't Say No

Karl Malden makes ape kill his foes
We're appalled, jaws agape, at their throes
And its simian muscle
Wins each criminal tussle
It's enthralled by the shape of his nose.

David Cairns



Top: Steve Forrest, Karl Mauldin and Claude Dauphin in Phantom of the Rue Morgue (Roy Del Ruth; 1954). Above: Charles Gemora as "Sultan", the gorilla.

Bwana De Boulogne

In Paris, be gay if you please
But careful when playing the tease
A frightening beast
Just might be released--
This paramour hangs out in trees.



Top: Jeanette (Patricia Medina) touches "Sultan", the ape (Charles Gemora) in Phantom of the Rue Morgue (Roy Del Ruth; 1954). Title by David de Cairns, of Shadoplay.

The Sultan of Schwing

I stare through the bars at my sweetie
May I share my most ardent entreaty?
Are my feelings returned?
Through this steel, am I spurned?
'Cause I'm hairy, bizarre and quite meaty.

David Cairns

"Sultan" the ape (Charles Gemora) eyes a mademoiselle in Phantom of the Rue Morgue (Roy Del Ruth; 1954).

The Morgue the Merrier

For females a fiend has a bent
Police, to the scene, have been sent
This colorful show
Is culled from E. Poe
And screened in 3D, an event.

Gendarmes investigate a gruesome murder by the Phantom of the Rue Morgue (Roy Del Ruth; 1954).

Clue Morgue

In Paris, a violent scrape 
Left there, in the skylight a shape
What fury released!
A furry, mad beast?
This terrible guy has a ape.

Karl Malden stars in Phantom of the Rue Morgue (Roy Del Ruth; 1954).

Rollo Victory

This killer, a wizard at throwing,
By guillotine hit, isn't slowing
At the wrists he is cropped
Does he quit? Is he stopped?
No, his villainous mitts keep on going.

Edward Brophy as the knife-thrower Rollo, on his way to his execution in Mad Love (Karl Freund; 1935).