Bye, Bye, Bettie

Way back in a different age
this brunette with bangs was the rage
The gal became cult
and the end result
was everyone loved Bettie Page

Hung Frankenstein

Mad doctors assisted in labs
by Misses make passes and grabs
It's Frankenstein fact
that frauleins distract
from monsters they've strapped onto slabs

Don't Spare The Rod

With seats in the Senate for sale
corruption has reached a new scale
The Rod should be fryin'
but due to George Ryan
he can't get the hot seat in jail

Executions in Illinois were put on hold by the state's
previous Governor, George Ryan, before he was
convicted and thrown in jail for corruption.
Never a dull moment!

Do You Take This Maniac?

Ol' Bluebeard collected eight wives
all whom had the time of their lives
But soon they were gored
when Bluebeard grew bored
and used his collection of knives

That Sinister Burge

For cops who from badges have strayed
no justice, not even delayed
They tortured and walked
and nobody talked
The 'Blue Wall' is a shameful parade

Desire Under The El's

Oh, "Stella!" cried Stanley Kowalski
T. Williams' he-manly guy-fallski
This coarse, hirsute brute
is hot in pursuit
of sisters to throw against wall-ski





This concludes Stella week. Thanks for
putting up with our indulgence!

The Slutty Professor

Despite all their serums and potions
and nutty proffesorish notions
it's not to mad docs
the audience flocks:
Assistants cause all the commotions

Come On and On

"Come hither" some glances may say
And some "Come on over and play."
With clothes, not a trace,
the look on her face
says "Fella, come roll in the hay"

Stellar Stella

Yup, seein', they say, is believin'
This here pic of Miss Stella Stevens
that I have just found
will keep you around
I'm sayin' you soon won't be leavin'

Impression Repression

No turkey is that in the straw

This vision that's stacked in the raw

If I'm Claude Monet

seein' her in the hay

I don't think I'd bother to draw

Stella By Starlight

Welcome to Stella Week at Limerwrecks, where we indulge
in nostalgic leering at that sexy 60s starlet, Stella Stevens,
and destroy any possible politically correct credibility.
Ms. Stevens starred in many films, including Li'l Abner,
Man Trap, Too Late Blues, The Nutty Professor and
Girls, Girls, Girls, later gaining some credibility herself in
Sam Peckinpah's The Ballad of Cable Hogue.

Red Trails in the Sunset

A gunfight at sunset, the plot
Two guns at the same time were shot
The showdown, complete
the lowdown, tout suite:
Two gunmen dropped dead on the spot

Pair o' shoots

In waistbands these babies are tucked

with plenty of bang for your buck

Full barreled or snub

just watch it there, bub

This yin and this yang you'd best duck