LimerWrecks

The night before Christmas and lo, the castle was buried in snow. A monster was stirring as engines were purring, and lab machines started t...

  Poor Santa's not feeling so jolly He's decked in surreal boughs of holly With visions of dread that dance in his head of gingerbre...

  To the girls and the boys IT gives back So it hurls all its toys in a sack As to those not so nice They lie frozen in ice --From Surly, th...

  A chimney is also a hole An in-way for Mr. North Pole If Nick'las gets stuck Your Chrismas might suck Unless you want plenty of coal! ...

  It's Christmas, he's done with his shopping The Mrs. is stunned, her eyes popping He bought her a gift And thought not of thrift N...

  On Christmas, alas and alack, A grisly and ghastly attack! Some gifts keep on giving,  Some miffed, are still living... See Kris get attac...

It's Easter, give praise, do not mourn Your deceased savior's raised and reborn But these dead, now alive Open heads to survive And ...

So Menzies was wearing a wire? Old friends should play fair, or retire You shoot, but alack, The coot then shoots back It ends for you there...

Marlene, black-wigged, eyes beholders Our main man's grown big as some boulders But his wistful, sad gaze Through the mist of past days...

Sheriff Hank gave up booze, now eats candy When he drank he'd get woozy on brandy Though he limps through this thriller He's no gimp...

Uncle Joe cuts a fig short and squat Face of dough, flips his wig when he's caught In a cheap hotel room The poor creep meets his doom A...

A hulking and gritty grotesque A skulking and bitter burlesque Of clout and ambition Now out of condition His bulk doesn't fit 'nea...

In a sweater all busty and pert Like Betty, she's thrusting, overt Now plunged into Hades With grungy Mercedes She's fretful, nonplu...