Today's ode to a favorite food: Rice
Steamed/fried/puffed, any way will suffice
That paddy-grown grain
Sends joy through my brain
Those were ant eggs you served me?? What?!? TWICE?!?
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Badministrator: SURLY HACK, aka HILARY BARTA..................... Scary Consigliere: DAVID CAIRNS Surreal Estate Agent: NORM KNOTT
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23 comments:
Mmm…sushi, stir fried, Bi Bim Bop
That last comes with fried egg on top
Served sticky it's sweet
Like Rice Krispy Treat
I love rice so much I can’t STOP!
At brides and grooms rice once was thrown
In modern times rice is now known
To be conniving
And for war striving
That's what Condileeza has shown
I just can't get enough of the stuff
Minute Rice is not quite quick enough
For dinner each night
I cook it up right
It's a winner: Light ivory fluff!
I bow to my fellow rice-fiend
His appetite for, I just gleaned
For Breakfast and Sup
He'll gobble it up
You slob, that pan needs to be cleaned!
Ask Norman to wipe up that dish
To clean after me is his wish
As a guy, he's a bit
How shall I put it?
Let's say he's a bit of a "swish"
Now I grok your domestical scene--
Norm performs his thrice-daily routine:
After sating your hunger,
He plays 'Felix Unger';
Your dishes are always kept clean!
How queer of you, dear, to say that stuff
I guess it makes you feel big and tough
Just you wait and see
Cuz your latency
Will always arise to call your bluff
I notice a trash can is near
Ev'ry lim'rick that I post here
It may be minimal
But it's subliminal
Meaning to me is quite clear
SurlyH sure is one brazen bloke
Making you, Norm, the butt of his joke
You can stifle his plans
By alerting his fans
He was seen with Boy George doing coke!
Be careful when casting aspersion
When full of indecent peversion
The calling of names here
Is not a child's game, dear
But dangerous adults-only version
Be careful when writing 'bout sex here
Cuz Surl will give you a stern lecture
Lots of teeth gnashing
Complete with tongue lashing
EE-Yuk! That's an ECH!-rated picture
It's not, sir, that I am a prude
But you who are vulgar and rude
When insults are thrown
You try to disown
The fruits of your bad attitude
Just who are you calling a fruit, sir?
Do you want a taste of my boot, sir?
I know you're a lover
Of vulcanized rubber
Just don't nibble thru to my foot, sir!
"Bwaa-ha-ha-ha-haaa!", chortle I
Neither knows where my sympathies lie
When brother fights brother
They'll wipe out each other
My complicity in, I'll deny!
Gadzooks! Golly gosh! And Good Lord!
This back-and-forth chat's got me bored
I want any more
I'll crack closet door
And visit those who I've deplored
SurlyH and Boy George did no coke
It's clear, from right here, I misspoke
Subject matter's turned creepy
From the fighting, you're sleepy
A truce can we call? Okey-doke!
Like Tweedledum and Tweedle Dee Dee
Exchanging words so impolitely
We've wasted our time
Insulting in rhyme
We're making this blog site unsightly
This post started out very nice
Then we added far too much spice
A dish causing pain
That was about grain
Nutrish and delicious--dat's RICE!
Both grains--long and short, and basmati
Types plain, extra fancy, all hotties
If future, bleak world
Disdained this starch, pearled
I’d have to say "Beam me up, Scotty!"
Nearly everyone savors rice pudding
From Linda Hunt to Cuba Gooding
I fed some one day
To a grim emigre
He smiled, said, "Now understooding."
In extolling rice, you've let loose
Releasing your creative juice
Would it be vulgar
To mention bulgur?
I so like the taste of couscous
Some couscous will spruce up a goose
As long as it's lathered in juice
Pan drippings from bird
In gold grain are stirred
And cranberries add touch chartreuse
Howard Hughes once flew a Spruce Goose
He knew it w'dn't move on couscous
With nary a care
He soared in the air
With juice Doctor Seuss had produced
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