Tuesday, January 17, 2017

Noir is Hell



Poor Danny did not have much luck
Chicks ran when they'd spot him, yelled "Yuck!"
If one gave him a tumble
He'd rave and then crumble
His can in noir plotting was stuck.

David Cairns

Dan Duryea and June Vincent in Black Angel (Roy William Neill, 1946).

Monday, January 16, 2017

Dipsomaniactor



Perpetual schlub, schmoe and loser
Pathetic night-clubber and boozer
This poor Dan's a sad dope
Has no chance, has no hope
He's no threat, just a substance abuser.

 David Cairns

Dan Duryea played more than his share of down and out drunks. And no one did a flophouse alky better than he. With June Vincent in Black Angel (Roy William Neill, 1946).

Sunday, January 15, 2017

CGIs Without a Face



Like carrion snacking on feasts
They tear and attack like wild beasts
Then wearing death-masks
They carry out tasks
Not caring the actor's deceased.

Surly Hack with David Cairns



The late Peter Cushing does not appear in Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (Gareth Edwards; 2016), The character of Grand Moff Tarkin is a creepy computer generated simulacrum, a digital zombie. Shame on the film's producers, and shame on Cushing's estate.

Saturday, January 14, 2017

These Ghoulish Things Remind Me of You



Your eyes and your nose, some guy's head
Disguising his pose in your stead
Abusing your face
In a gruesome disgrace
One dies but the show's never dead.

The late Peter Cushing does not appear in Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (Gareth Edwards; 2016). Grand Moff Tarkin is a fabrication: it's actor Guy Henry with layers of CGI "fake-up".

Friday, January 13, 2017

Verbal Duryea



Hangdog Dan's started slurring his words
Got some brandy and gurgled two-thirds
Amnesiac? Crazy?
Post-blackout, all's hazy
This rancid liqueur's for the birds.

David Cairns

Dan Duryea drinks like there's no tomorrow in Black Angel (Roy William Neill, 1946).

Thursday, January 12, 2017

Binge Benefits



In spirits awash, I go blurry
My fears have been quashed, I've no worry
Like the grime of the day
My crimes fade away       
So, cheers! Let's get sloshed in a hurry.



Dan Duryea's drunken flashback in Black Angel (Roy William Neill, 1946). Title by David Cairns, all business.

Wednesday, January 11, 2017

One Groggy Evening



How drunk can this guzzler get?
Eyes sunken, he's fuzzy and wet
What booze does he use?
The usual brews
In a funk, he get's buzzed to forget.



Dan Duryea has a drunken flashback in Black Angel (Roy William Neill, 1946).

Tuesday, January 10, 2017

Black-Out? Curtains!



For his anguish he drinks: anesthesia
For a hangover, milk of magnesia
But he blacks out, gets fuddled
All cracked-up and muddled
Now he's jangled, can't think: it's amnesia!

David Cairns

June Vincent watches Dan Duryea sleep one off in Black Angel (Roy William Neill, 1946). Our title could refer to any number of tales by author Cornell Woolrich, writer of the film's source novel.

Monday, January 9, 2017

Rhapsody in Booze



For the blues and the shakes he gets blotto
"All the booze that it takes" is his motto
The keyboard gets drunk
On tequila...ker-plunk!
The music they make is staccato.



Dan Duryea hits the skids in Black Angel (Roy William Neill, 1946). Title idea by rhapsodic Donald B. Benson.

Friday, January 6, 2017

A Mate Worse Than Death



Though he favors light music when boozy,
What he craves is a screw -- and a doozy
So they make him a mate
Though his ache is still great
'Cause, post-graveyard, this floozy's still choosy!

Elsa Lanchester and Boris Karloff in Bride of Frankenstein (James Whale; 1935). Title by no-worse-for-wear Donald B. Benson.

Thursday, January 5, 2017

GGI Sore



These stars shine undimmed on our screens
Incarnate in glimmering scenes
But the slob misbehaves
Who's robbing their graves
With tarnishing sim-like machines.

David Cairns

Peter Cushing first portrayed Grand Moff Tarkin in Star Wars.(George Lucas; 1977). The actor died in 1994, but for Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (Gareth Edwards; 2016), CGI technicians grafted his features onto the head of another actor. How long before this troubling procedure becomes common practice? Here's a report from Variety.

Wednesday, January 4, 2017

Hangover My Dead Body

 

So I'm napping a binge off in bed
And a tapping unhinges my head
Then this broad barges in
Good lawd, what a din!
Her yapping would injure the dead.

June Vincent disturbs drunk Dan Duryea in Black Angel (Roy William Neill, 1946). Title by David Cairns, who keeps hanging around.

Tuesday, January 3, 2017

Life After Death Star



In this new Star Wars sequel they're pushing
You can view the unique Peter Cushing
With select, cut and paste
And execrable taste
The crew give his features a smooshing.

David Cairns

Peter Cushing first portrayed Grand Moff Tarkin in Star Wars. The actor died in 1994. For Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (Gareth Edwards; 2016), ghoulish CGI technicians grafted the late Cushing's features onto another actor. In this case, special effects equals grave robbing and reanimating a corpse. At Disney, dollars outweigh dignity. With our repurposing of stills and screengrabs, LimerWrecks itself is a site on the slippery slope of digital transgression. Here's a New York Times article on the issue.